Where is all the rapidly accelerating global warming that is supposed to be gripping the world?
It’s not in the air. Atmospheric temperature readings show global temperatures have been flat for more than a decade.
It’s not in the upper ocean. Sea surface temperature readings similarly show no recent warming.
It’s not in the polar ice caps. National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration satellite data show polar ice is currently more extensive than the long-term average.
Global warming activists have finally come up with a last line of defense they know nobody will able to prove wrong: The missing global warming is in the Bermuda Triangle.
No, I am not kidding. This is what they are claiming.
You see, the alarmists have been telling us for decades that rapidly accelerating global warming was imminent and unavoidable. The problem for the alarmists is the warming that has occurred has been modest and decelerating. In fact, it has ground to a complete halt for more than a decade.
So how do Al Gore, Michael Mann and the rest of the global warming Chicken Little’s save face when their promised global warming apocalypse fails to occur? Easy, blame it on the Bermuda Triangle.
“Where did global warming go? The deep ocean, experts say,” claimed NBC News in an April 11 headline.
“Where’s the heat? In the oceans!” USA Today claimed in a headline the same day.
The headlines reflect a prominent global warming activist claiming that he developed a computer model by which global warming can bypass the atmosphere, bypass the upper ocean, and be entirely hidden in the deep ocean; you know, that part of our planet where we really can’t measure or find anything. The missing global warming is apparently hanging out at the underwater space alien base in the heart of the Bermuda Triangle, along with the missing files proving the 9/11 Truthers are right that George W. Bush bombed the World Trade Center, along with the Vast Rightwing Conspiracy files proving that Bill Clinton really did not have sexual relations with that woman, Miss Lewinsky, and along with the missing film footage proving the seven Apollo astronauts and two Johnson Space Center directors who claim global warming is not a crisis really did stage their moon landings on a vacant lot somewhere in the Arizona desert.
The global warming activists, of course, do their best to make their Bermuda Triangle defense sound scientific. The paper claims all this phantom global warming really can directly bypass the atmosphere and the upper ocean if winds start blowing strangely enough and strongly enough to bury the warming deep in the ocean. Thankfully, we can spare ourselves the dizzying asserted logic of such claims by examining recent global sea surface wind data. As Bermuda Triangle-busting science would have it, NASA satellite instruments show global sea surface wind speeds have declined rather than increased during the past decade.
So much for the Bermuda Triangle….
Nevertheless, it has been quite interesting watching the alarmists go into conniptions imploring us to trust them on this final last line of defense. “No, you can’t objectively verify our claims, but you can’t objectively disprove the Bermuda Triangle either,” the alarmists argue. “Just trust us. And if you do, as a bonus, we’ll show you the secret undersea living quarters of Elvis Presley and Jim Morrison.”
[First published at Forbes]